no.27

wont update my blog from now on

no.26

feel tired...............................................................................
feel down..............................................................................

no.25

at cyber here...js pass by drop here say hi to everyone...dun noe u gals got missed me bo...*shy*...well...i buy 2 x 1.5l mineral water n 1 x 500ml mineral water n panadols oso...headache...

ok ba....prepared bek...

no.24

The time now is 4:02pm...from js now kip sms-in wif mei...wanna noe she ok bo...well...lucky tat she everything fine...but still woli ba...kip read her blog repeat n repeat...feel my heart broken ki...coz my mei sad...n down...mei...i onli can said is u r always in my heart forever...u always my lovely mei...naughty mei...well...now wanna prepare go home...tmr afternoon leave dis dam place to another place bcoz for attend another meeting ba...later update my blog ba...chaos

no.23

now is 1:51pm, mei asked me update my blog...but now feel dun like upate it coz i woli abt her rite now...

finish updated...dun care u all like or not...js accept my new post...

"Lose Control" by Waldo's People

I don't wanna lose control, but I'm falling
Falling down...

I got this panic emotion that I cannot describe to you
My world is tumbelling down what am I, what am I gonna do
Ca-can't deny it, deny it, what am I going through
Ca-can not fight it, can fight it, now I'm looking for the truth

refrain:
I don't wanna live a lie – Checking on my sanity
'Cause maybe baby I can do without – Is it all a fantasy
I don't wanna live a lie – Is this my reality
It's spinning round 'n' round day and night

refrain2:
I don't wanna lose control, but I'm falling
I just can't believe it
Never thought that I would be the one
Falling down
(2x)

I'm on a critical mission, got my destiny in my hands
Like Peter Piper I take control put a spell on the mass
I cause hysteria, worry yourself, that's how I roll
It's not a drill, I'm for real, I'm a man who's out of control

refrain

refrain2 (2x)

I'm falling, I'm falling
I just can't believe it
I'm falling, I'm falling down

Akon - Freedom

no.22

well...soli abt bo update my blog dis few days...coz palm pain...n soli tat i everyday moody...after concert...my frenz sot ki...edited d photo for me which i used to perform...n make my mei scary n woli...i wondering wanna take d photo down or not...sat morning...6am received call from my frenz...he said dun noe how to teach those primary kids coz they too noisy...hard to control...he noe i very 'powerful'...those primary kids sure scare me...well...i said ok to him n ask him come to fetch me to school...mei...soli...i dint rest much...n i noe when u noe me bo rest well...u wil f5 to me ==lll...after school...imy frenz asked me wanna go to pc fair...i said ok...coz nid help mei find some information...c d ipod nano hv black colour bo...when we omos reached d place...suddenly he received a call from our choir's conductor...she nid help from us for moving d tables n chairs...my frenz asked me how...i said is ok...lets go help her den...i try not use my rite hand to move those...but hard...==lll...after moving...we straight go pc fair to search...well...i spend RM370 to buy a external HDD 1TB ^_^...cheap...hahaha...after searching in thr...we bek home for rest...coz late night hv choir practise at 7pm...den i home on my maple...cont mapling wif mei...helping moon lvling ^_^...mei woli abt me coz scare me use my hand ba...well...tat nite i js enjoy singing nia ^_^ hahaha...bo use my hand...after choir practise...i go to worship team thr...coz d song ldr ask for my help...they short of player...so i c i can b d drummer or wat...thr hv a backup drummer stand by sit beside me...he is new comer...but...when i try beating d drum...cmi...cant even hold d drumsticks properly...veli pain...den i ask tat kid to play...he reli dam poor in rhythm...teach me..my blood all spread out from my head...==lll...

early sunday morning 6am ba...i wake up le...wash up den rush to church...helping him...sit beside him n kip gv him d tempo...den rush home fetch grandpa for medic...den breakfast lo...if bo...someone sure snatch me...==lll... home mapling awhile...den go for band practise...den happen many things...make me down to hell...n d rest...dun wanna tok abt...but at last is...mei kip supporting me...n i feel much better now...

well...haha...im now at office working n mapling ^_^

no.21

js bek from hospital...i fainted js now...get help from my frenz...rite hand omos spoiled...lucky mei n my babe n gin supported me...d concert veli successful...onli my frenz shock while c my piano...den he take d photo n edited for me...==lll...

after concert...many gals wan ss wif me n chit chat wif me...tat time i was helping my frenz moving d stages to backstage...mei...i do care n c got sharp thing or not...so dun woli...^_^...reli dam tired...

no.20

cmk...dis morning d line stil stable...b4 d 2x exp all laggy ki...12pm we go prepare bossing at spooky world...me super laggy til si...but i try my best to help moon n bygones helmed...tat joy always las minute one...kip find attacker for boss...she tot we hv american time for w8in her finding d attacker...i veli dulan...so i on my main mega twice finding NL & BM n pm my mei...coz she oso quite mad sia...n we hv to down d boss...so we can chiong our lvl during d 2x event...

we cant down d boss coz mei dc n hero die...dam hate...aiks...bo mood...now training wif mei

no.19

morning everyone, now at office do my work 1st den rush home for piano practice, kinda woli abt my hand, d palm tio cut las nite, stil painful ba, las nite pei mei stil 2:40am but i beh tahan le coz over stressed n super tired, lucky tat mei so guai, hahaha, i ask her sms when she go to bed, wel, dis morning i check my phone is 3:05am, guai la my lovely mei f3...

now payin someone spam for me coz i dun wan my mei tired, MEI, pls do sleep long long sia, dun wake up so early, n pls ignore d super duper smelly perfume, d smell wont las for long, hahaha, 2day mood quite ok ba, las nite, my stomach so pain, sleeping half way n rush to toilet for da bian ==lll...n u noe wat...i nearly sleep inside d toilet...aiks...

well...i cont my work 1st...c how ba...today wan msia boss wif my mei help moon, bygones n leo di helmed...today can onli 1 round nia coz d 2x exp ba...las nite i told my frenz abt d 2x exp...he told me tat he gonna take sick leave n rush home for chiong his char...==lll...swt...

no.18

today i such a jerk...make mei n gin pissed off...soli gals...im soli...i nvr wanna b like tat b4...i relli over stressed...when i was wif u gals js now...they kip calling me sms me abt 2nite discussion...coz dis afternoon...i kip telling dem tat i cant attend d discussion coz i hv a rehearsal tonite...dunno why they dun wan understand my situation...onli care abt demself...wan me come den i must...

2nite rehearsal make me bo mood oso...those officers gv me a strange look...d rev ask me n another female officer stay wif her coz abt d money matters...las yr band performance...i spend RM9xx for d decoration so church wil subside RM400 for me...tat female officer claimed tat i owe her RM2xx so she claimed d RM400 from church...wat her done is not under proccedure...everyone noe im a 'stpm' person...den i asked her wat money i hvnt pay to her...she said is some debt ba...ask her show me d receipt...she said forget...nvm...i dun care tat money...u like js take it ba...den another officer rush to me said no matter wat i must attend d discussion abt a band member lost d instrument coz been stolen by thief...n i tol dem very clearly tat d boy must pay full cost of d instrument...

dey kip say mai dis mai tat la....n kip ask how abt other band...n such case or not...i tol dem yes...pay full amount...i dun care wat they tink...coz i tol dem my thought...they wan listen or not...js dun care...but dun blame me for not telling clearly...

during d rehearsal...dam fking adult...dun wanna help...tot i too free or wat...kip kpkp thr...so i n some frenz move those heavy stages to backstage...i hurt tio my bek...n cut by a nail...js bek from hospital...dun noe tmr how to play piano...bo bian...forced myself ba...

abt js now in maple...my mei spam d mit from 9am til 6pm ba...i woli abt her...non stop one...n she dun wan listen to me n gin...my heart stabbing ba...i blame myself why i cant help her...why...n leave her thr alone training...i so dam useless...

wel...gratx my mei helmed las nite...me n gin so happy abt it...mei...gin...soli...reli soli...

no.17

thinking change my ownself blog to blogspot...coz dis spaces...dun noe how to use ba....any idea for me...change or not change....well....today my mei wake up sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo dam early...==lll...swt....kinda woli abt her ba...not enuff sleep....later stil wan go for work...n den...==lll....well...today i bo work...coz abt las nite ba...kip vomit n da bian whole nite...so grandpa let me rest at home....hmm....nah....wan help moon n mei helmed ba...tat is my mission today ^_^....but.....DAM STREAMYX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..................wat r u doin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....let me on maple ba.....dam....... try so many times.....dam....cant even on....line sux......i gonna kisiao.....dam..........argh..... calm down 1st.......

no.16

ok..try to recall wat happen dis few days...all noe i facing 'stpm' ba...=p

10/4/2009 Good friday

well...bo work tat day...so can sleep up late but ownself wake up automatically...noe why...coz maple hv 2x event ba...wan help mei dem chiong lv ^_^...==lll...mei oso wake up early too...tat day js kip training nth happen til evening 5pm or sth...grandma come find me...she said grandpa leg tio cut...n nid to send him to clinic...grandpa said w8 1st...he called doc got open clinic or bo...so i rush to my pc...tel gin abt it...n grandpa phone down say clinic bo open...so i afk char at leafre town w8 gin reach to skele...n i rush to my grandpa check his wound n cal my frenz help me...n oso ask tat doc come my hse if not i sure sue him not do his job well...after settle all ting...i rush bek to my bedroom...i live 1st floor...grandparent live 2nd floor...when i rush down...n sprain my left ankle one more time...lucky not like las time at kuching thr...cant even walk...pain til si ki...den me n gin cont training at skele...when mei bek...she ask me update my blog...i told her tat nth special happen ba...well...tat time i was 'stpm' agn...if she bo ask me update my blog...i sure forget wat happen js now...so i told her abt it......i tink like tat ba...bo liao ba ==lll

11/4/2009

wake up early in d morning...coz nid find map for moon to train...everyone w8in d 2x event...end up is...technical prob...so postpone til next notice...all maplers mad til kisiao...coz all arrange their time slot n buy 3.5k 2x coupon...everyone is sad abt it...bo bian ba...kip cont training moon...well gratx moon twin sis lv75 liao...me n mei so happy ^_^...after trainig moon...me n gin wan train mei's dk...den we go skele agn...suddenly gin said dun wan help from us...i quite down sia...coz i wanna train mei's dk to lv150(dis is our target...well...bo bian oso...so me n gin stop train lo...bek to fm slacking...hmm......stil recall my 'stpm'...aiks... cant remember la T_T...

well...sth happen agn between me n gal jie...i wan afk my char in fm after training my mei's new char....tat nite so weird...everyone turn to mad...1st is me coz a lv2x rogue din ask for slot n come in js kil d monster...so i ask her pls cc n thx...but she kip hit those monster...i ask her one more time...den she start shooting me said she dun wan n bla bla bla...scold me whispering me n scold my family...walao eh...den i pissed off wanna ks her...mei n gin stop me...said no nid hiu tat idiot...so i endure lo...but...tat time...she kip whispering me scold me...argh...wanna kisiao ki...den mei said she done training coz she reached her target so wanna go bek to fm...dam...c tat idiot agn...she saw me n said bo ask me cc agn...and kip fck bla bla bla...dam hate...suddenly...gin pissed off...coz tat idiot do d same thing to gin...scold her through whisper...tat time i calmed down le...so me n mei rush to fm pei her...tat time gal jie...n sha oso thr....den i sit beside gin n sha dem...i wanna go toilet sia den i tel dem i afk sia...suddenly...i forget to check my stall so i rush to my stal c9r1...when i finish update my stall...i saw gin n sha stand above me...d top row...i go in tat stall n c wat they seeing...after tat...sha said she tio bomb by gal jie...so she mad...==lll...me n gin rush bek to r4...den we kip explain to gal jie ba...she dun wan believe...den she suddenly bo chap us...well...all of three kinda pissed off once agn...mei finally bek from outside(i tink ba)...she noe abt it...she d las one b a mad ppl...aiks...1st is me, 2nd is gin, 3rd is sha n las is mei...==lll

well...thx for my mei's help...chiong my lv from 98 to 103...reli xin teng abt her...coz she dun wan rest at all...but wat can i do...i always soft heart ba...she said she dun wan...n i bo bian lo...let her train ba...ytd...everyone so active...all chat chat chat...chat wif me n ask me how to do dis n tat....tat time i was training ba...died 6 times le...suddenly gal jie whispering me...when i wan reply her...died agn...==lll....she said she wan tok wif me ask me when i am free....n she saw i bo reply...she kip whispering said if dun wan her as my jie js said so...==lll...how come jie cant tink abt me...cant js lax or wat...dun anyhow said dis kind of thing to me...n i moody tat time oso...coz died so many times...beh song ki...den i spread out to mei lo...coz i promise her tat i wont hide anything to her...after trainig we went bek to fm...den i bl chat wif gal jie tat i free now...stil wan to tok wif me?...she asked my go c19r19...so i go lo...den she said she wanna found out tat why me n she become coldness...aiks...how u treat me las time...tot u mad...how i dare tok to u...mei noe how i act ba when mei is mad....i dun dare say anything n js sit beside my mei....so....jie on...how dare i go find her if she stil mad...n finally tat...i tol her i tink i cant hv jie or wat in my life coz im not caring enuff...n i kinda pissed off....so i log out my char lo....

ps all...short cut a lot....bo bian...wanna work ba f3...

no.15

at cyber here...outside heavy rain...now all wet....walk here wifout transport...wan calm myself down...i off my phone...i called my frenz afk my char.....................................................................................................................................

no.14

js kip tinking....am i too kind or wat...hahaha...nvm...i js too easy soft heart n tio bully ba....

now gin help mei training...jy ba all...

no.13

dun noe why i so emo...dam me...kip tinking abt gal jie, ex wife n guild members...dun noe why 3 members quit guild in 1 day...am i not doing my job well or wat...do they care abt d pro or nub...why cant b frenz or wat.............................

soli....no mood at all.................

no.12

js finish mapling...tonite dun noe wat happen to gal jie...from las nite she said she n me not close enuff...well...honestly..im d onli son in dis family...i dun noe how to explain my feeling to others or care abt others...i oledi try my best...but somehow...fail...gal jie...pls dun sad...im soli...to make u feel disappointed...eveyone means to me so much...but i nid some times...try b patient wif dis idiot didi ba...

actually..mood still down coz make me tink of tat gal...quite guilty ba...coz i was not by her side tat nite...if not...wont happen such thing in her life...i rather they hurt me...i dun wan they hurt one of my frenz...

we must appreciate our frenz...our family n everything...if we lost it...we wil regret so much....

You Took My Heart Away

Staring at the moon so blue
Turning all my thoughts to you
I was without hopes or dreams
I tried to dull an inner scream but you
saw me through

Walking on a path of air
See your faces everywhere
As you melt this heart of stone
you take my hand to guide me home and now
I'm in love

[Chorus:] You took my heart away
when my whole world was gray
You gave me everything
and a little bit more
And when it's cold at night
and you sleep by my side
you become the meaning of my life

Living in a world so cold
you are there to warm my soul
You came to mend a broken heart
You gave my life a brand new start and now
I'm in love

[Chorus:]
You took...

Holding your hand
I won't fear tomorrow
Here were we stand
we'll never be alone

no.11

some of photo of myself in maple

no.10

dis 2 days...my maple ex wife find me in msn...so surprise tat she find me agn after we divorce...well...kinda feel soli coz she quit maple might bcoz of me...i dun like hurt others feeling...i rather let dem hurt me...i js like others happy no matter i happy or not...is it weird...dun noe...from her blog...i found out tat she sick agn...feel woli abt her...coz she too young ba...everytime anyhow sick de...hope she well soon...

dun noe why today super active...super high...kip chatting in chat box wif everyone...well...crazy le ba...hahaha....who cares...well...tmr bo work...so i nid to editing my songs agn...faint...dis few days js like a robot sitting thr composing d song non-stop...las nite tio scold by everyone in maple...actually quite beh song la...but i noe they care abt me...n im d one who dun care myself in 1st place...so i beh song myself la...mei, gal jie n gin forced me to sleep...if bo...las nite i wont go to sleep...after sleep...feel quite gd...maybe i gv too much pressure on myself..cant lax down awhile...

well...abt d drinks...i can let u gals drink but not drunk....coz im woli ba...las time...mei go drink...i woli abt whole nite...wish i wil thr...guard her to avoid any bad things...coz...hv a gals...i care so much when im sec school...i treat her as my best frenz...one nite...she go pub coz she arguing wif her bf...den...she raped by dos dam ppl...u noe wat happen to dis gal...she suicide...........................if i was thr...i wil protect her...dam....dam mood...miss her so.........i fight wif her bf...but...my frenz stop me for beating him down...they said why i nid to punch him since tat gal die...can make her alive or wat...fck..................................................

no mood write anymore...tats it.....bb

no.9

i gonna gv up le...brain stil sot...cant tink anymore...dam braim...useless brain...argh...js now go church..they din attend wat they so called meeting ==lll...let me w8 thr alone more den 1 hour...cal dem ask dem whether they coming or not...they said sure come....w8 w8 w8...1hour pass le...i dun care...str8 go buy buns...las nite til dis afternoon hvnt eat...must force me eat sth...or not...==lll sure die fast if 'they' noe...when i w8in...dam weather...heavy rain...make me all wet...stil nid w8 dem thr...

oledi take bath le...my frenz called me...said they bored...wan come my hse sing k...i let dem in ba...coz nid to spread it out when sing k...but...feel bad...dizzy...nearly faint when i sing loud...aiks...tink i crazy liao la...hahaha...they wan take me to pub c gals...i reject...coz reli feel dam lazy n must force me to tink d song...

finally can on9 le...kinda woli abt my mei...she reli...aiks...so hate to c ppl bully ppl around...js now on maple...hv idiot come to find mei...he said he is mei's ex...wan noe who is mei's dar now...i ask him wat he wan for noe who is mei's dar...he said wan make mei n her dar argue ==lll...dam...i freaky mad...i asked whr he from...den i directly find him out pui tai ji...he said he from penang...i wil book a ticket fly over thr to punch he...sha n leo di ask me calm down...ignore tat idiot...aiks...mei is my onli mei...who tio her = tio me...

well...actually...soon i wil go to penang n selangor for meeting...i hope can meet u guys...but dun noe my schedule yet ==lll...

so long bo listen pop music le....only listen some classical music...coz for d concert...i like meaningful songs...especially luv songs....hahaha...==lll

no.8

js home...被人放飞机...now hvnt eat yet...js buy some bun home...nth to say...

no.7

4 days bo sleep...wanna break my record...6 days bo sleep...haha...dun noe can tahan ==lll...lolx...nose bleedin agn...continue composing song

no.6

feel dizzy...js finish composing a song...hvnt take my breakfast yet...dun feel wan eat...aiks...c how la...mayb out for lunch ba or kip composing another songs

no.5

hand tio sprain...veli pain...now use left typin...rite hand cant move a bit...helpin my uncle changin batt...d screw sibeh hard to unsrew it...my uncle js stand thr watch nia...dun wan come to help...so i forced myself to unsrew it...finally can le...but hand sprain ki....but wat can i do..nth..js force me agn...take out d bad batt n replace wif a new one....al use my dam rite hand...so worst n worst ki...bek hurt agn...painful kisiao ki............wat a uncle i hv........................................

no.4

feel veli emo.....js dun noe how to lax...now my rite sprain ki.....stil force myself compose d songs..my rite hand cant move ==lll...if tonite bo sleep...tats mean i dn sleep for 4 days le...tmr bo work coz my hand sprain...but i nid to chiong all d songs...js please...please do appreciate wat i hv done...we r a team...i really nid ur support..i sibeh fan...dun bother to let her noe..onli make her more woli...she now facing her prob in uni...js try to b strong ba...kinda wan do silly tings tonite...if beh tahan..i dun noe how liao...outside heavy raining...inside oso raining...coz my nose bleeding agn ==lll...hahaha..................................................................

no.3

dis few days so dam emo...i try to fix things out...i hv do my duty...but why kip blame me dis n tat w/o any reason...u tink im ur servant or wat....everyday kip calling me n scold me...bla bla bla...u dis stupid selfish adult...can u tink abt my situation...no nid work..no nid rest meh...ask me out..den i must out immediately...i hv other service...tel u d reason..u not accept...n kip say i not responsibility...i oledi said my band cant accept d dam performance coz din prepare for tat...u cal me for d advise..den me n my team gv u d answer...but wat...u say ok dun accept d performance...onli few hrs nia...u said must do d performance for dis coming 25 april...dam...u hv make ur mind...why stil wan seek for advise....CAN U PLS REPECT US A LITTLE BIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....dam fckin emo.............

why i wan live in dis world lagi....why means to me for living ....all blame me...all use me....i dun mind.....but pls gv me a little respect n do appreciate wat i hv done for dis few yrs....las yr i said i wan resign...i cant stand any longer...u come to beg me said d band nid me a lot...u said u wil help me...fully support me...now wat....u said dis none of ur businness...dun care abt my illness....dun care abt my health....everyday...my nose bleeding....dis few days fever...u noe wat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....u say wan out for discussion...no nid find such dam fckin reason to skip d discussion...i no sleep for 3 days for doin 4 event's project....wat d hell u wan me deal wif....no one help me...but al said im super duper li hai...no nid help....can done all d things w/o helpin.....every nite force myself force my brain force to tink abt how should i do....wat should i do....music music music...arrange arrange arrange....i arrange 3 songs for u...now u said dun wan d songs coz ..... nah.....fine....

i js so useless....i js ..................==lll

Happy Bdae CaNdY

no.2

Yesterday din write my post coz fckin no mood n dun noe wat to write in...dam...i found myself dam fckin useless...let my frenz around me so woli...soli abt las nite..make u all pissed off...dam...i js cant control my emo...i try my best to control but somehow u all noe me so well...cant hide anything from u all...i try to wear a mask n hide myself out...f3...jkin onli....dun kill me...

well...today is CaNdY guild birthday...im so honest can alliance wif CaNdY guild n Divinity guild coz they so helpful n frendly...wel...wish u all candian happy mapling n happy slackin...


X3DollX3 aka miko n mei09mei my caring mei


Sha CaNdy Guild Master, Gin CaNdY Guild Jr Master n myself


CaNdY Rox...if how cute they r.. sha n Moon aka stephy





lax lax gin...dun kill birdy...look they so cute den kisiao..

1st time write in blog

hiie all, dis my 1st time use blog...well dun noe wat to write...anyway....
<3mei<3gin<3moon<3ohanafamily.....
i will try to control my emo....
i will b strong n face d prob infront of me


dis is Ohana Family....wei miko.....whr is two new members' photo f3....fast upload la